Just when I thought things were hopeless, a chance meeting between me and someone that showed me the way many years ago, was she going to tell me what I needed or wanted?
She told me everything that I wasn't prepared to hear, all the opposite things that I was doing, stop resisting all the things I was fighting against, I needed to talk more, be social, face my fears about various things, water, and change. I had to remove the negative energy in my life, get back to my beliefs about something that was greater than me, be who I used to be, most of all she told me, I couldn't wait for someone to forgive me, I had to forgive, I had to believe that what my wife had been doing for all those years wasn't against me, but for me. I was shocked, mostly that I had forgotten my beliefs over the years, I had stopped believing that there was something mystical in the world, some sort of magic, I had grown up, all through school I was the kid who would never want to get old, always be a child at heart, see things that others couldnt, believe in what others wouldnt, I had lost myself, I let the opinions of others control me, and ruin me, it was time to remember my true self. I told my wife all of this, in an instant I saw in her eyes the same look she had years ago, that one of belief in me, of hope, was this my second chance? She seemed to enjoy my company more, we were hanging out more, I felt like it was the start of something new, something better. On the date of our wedding anniversary we went to see Cats, and dinner, after Cats, just before dinner, we were looking out at the city lights on a mountain, it was somewhere I hadnt been for some time, she hugged me and said, 'I can imagine us together like this again', and then she kissed me...was this a new start for us? I hoped it was.
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